Love N Light by Anabelle

Happy New Year!!!

2012-01-08T02:36:00.000-08:00

We’ve fought a long and bitter war, my twin soul and I: lost and lonely fallen angels, exiled from a misty, half-forgotten galaxy of stars. Wounded cruelly by pretenders; caught between their tangled webs of punishment; shocked and torn asunder by the sudden, awful violence

Tortured by the clever lies and crushed beneath the icy weight of the stern, unyielding heart… that lengthened every hour into a day, every day into a year, every year into eternities of waiting. Blinded to recklessness by those bursts of arrogance and pride— as the innocent child, stilled and helpless, deep within us cried

Still we battled on, striking blow for blow, driven by the pounding drums of our own throbbing passion. We stumbled at the precipice of love’s enticing madness… to fall, at last, in trembling fear into the tomb-like silence— consumed by inconsolable sadness and the bleakness of despair

We bear… the wounds and scars of furious battle, I and my twin soul. But now, in peaceful silence, with all our shattered pieces, whole, we walk into the pyramid-shaped rainbow of tomorrow’s brighter sunshine; crowned by gentle love that did not die… but has survived the night of selfish seeking to wait for morning’s soft forgiveness and the dawn of understanding

Gooberz by Linda Goodman

Happy New Year Everyone

I did my own research on Parts of Arabic because I am confused. My instinct is telling me there’s something wrong with my natal chart because I can’t relate to it. It doesn’t resonate with my personal circumstances. No matter how hard I try to make sense out of it, I just cannot understand it. So I gave up. I consider that maybe it’s not my limited knowledge in astrology that prevents me from understanding. It’s the natal chart I got from astro that confuses me. My instinct is right. I am using a wrong chart. The parts of Arabic showed me that there’s another way of getting a chart that’s more accurate to a person’s life using the Part of Fortune system. I created my new natal chart from scratch because I got no net connection at home and I am not sure if astro.com could provide me such chart. I also found out that the Pars of Fortune from astro isn’t accurate too. So I have to start from zero

I learned a lot from my research. I learned how to compute degrees around the zodiac. It’s interesting to see hidden points, also called parts or lots in Arabic within the 360 degrees of the zodiac. I also learned that the Parts of Fortune is more important than the Sun or the moon because it is the point where the ascendant (the physical body of the person); sun (the fulfillment); and the moon (the need of the soul) actually meet or combine its energy. The Parts of Fortune system is the best horoscope (hour marker) to use in casting a chart of a person. It makes a completely different result and provides a completely and more accurate interpretation.&

It’s like a puzzle, the pieces finally fit together. I’ve been misled for some time. I don’t regret it because it’s part of being a researcher and a student. The chart I got from my humble computations combined with my intuition is exactly true to my circumstances now. I finally feel confident to use it for reference in the future. I can now reflect back on my life and relate to it instead of scratching my head out of confusion. I am dropping astrology now and focus on other subjects such as karma and soul mates because I already got what I’ve been looking for. I got so inspired by Linda Goodman’s theories on soul mates, it could be my new year’s resolution

P.S. Thanks to all who sent their greetings last November. I forgot this blog’s anniversary. It’s a busy time for me. Again Happy New Year to all

Happy Diwali: The Festival of Lights

2011-10-26T08:41:00.000-07:00

Happy Diwali to all my Indian Friends all over the world!

Number 30 The Loner - Meditation (Also Number 39 and 48)

2011-10-25T06:22:00.000-07:00

Number 30 The Loner- Meditation

This is a number of retrospection, thoughtful deduction, and mental superiority over others. However, it belongs completely to the mental plane, and those represented by it often put all material things to the side, not because they have to, but because they wish to doso. Consequently the compound number 30 is neither fortunate nor unfortunate, because it can be either, depending entirely upon the desire of the person (or entity) it represents. The vibration of 30 can be all- powerful, but it is often indifferent, according to the will of the person. Those whose name equals 30, or who were born on the 30th day of any month, generally count few people as their friends. They tend to be taciturn loners, preferring to be alone with their own thoughts. Social functions and public gatherings are not their style. 30 doesn't deny happiness or success, but fulfillment more often found in retreating from the chaos of the market place, so that one's mental superiority may be used to develop something worthwhile to the world... to write ideas which may change the world... or to protect and develop one's personal talents, such as art or other gifts. It indicates a lonely, yet frequently rewarding life pattern.

Number 39 and 48 has the same meaning as 30.

Source: Star Signs: The Secret Code of the Universe by Linda Goodman

Gadaffi's Death and Libya

2011-10-24T09:38:00.000-07:00

I've been reflecting deeply upon learning about Gadaffi's death. The Libyan nation is rejoicing right now for the death of their "dictator." I say, what now? I saw his pictures, learned how he died. I am not even sure what I felt and still feeling right now. Its just horrible because for one, no one deserves to die the way that he did considering he was once a leader of a nation.

This is circulating around my facebook right now. Libya and Libyan "dictator" Muammar Gaddafi:

1. There is no electricity bill in... Libya; electricity is free for all its citizens.

2. There is no interest on loans, banks in Libya are state-owned and loans given to all its citizens at 0% interest by law.

3. Home considered a human right in Libya – Gaddafi vowed that his parents would not get a house until everyone in Libya had a home. Gaddafi’s father has died while him, his wife and his mother are still living in a tent.

4. All newlyweds in Libya receive $60,000 Dinar (US$ 50,000 ) by the government to buy their first apartment so to help start up the family.

5. Education and medical treatments are free in Libya. Before Gaddafi only 25% of Libyans are literate. Today the figure is 83%.

6. Should Libyans want to take up farming career, they would receive farming land, a farming house, equipments, seeds and livestock to kick- start their farms – all for free.

7. If Libyans cannot find the education or medical facilities they need in Libya, the government funds them to go abroad for it – not only free but they get US $2, 300/mth accommodation and car allowance.

8. In Libyan, if a Libyan buys a car, the government subsidized 50% of the price.

9. The price of petrol in Libya is $0. 14 per liter.

10. Libya has no external debt and its reserves amount to $150 billion – now frozen globally.

11. If a Libyan is unable to get employment after graduation the state would pay the average salary of the profession as if he or she is employed until employment is found.

12. A portion of Libyan oil sale is, credited directly to the bank accounts of all Libyan citizens.

13. A mother who gave birth to a child receive US $5 ,000

14. 40 loaves of bread in Libya costs $ 0.15

15. 25% of Libyans have a university degree

16. Gaddafi carried out the world’s largest irrigation project, known as the Great Man-Made River project, to make water readily available throughout the desert country.

Some believed, some don't. I believe that the free-education and free electricity in Libya is true as confirmed by my father. My Dad said that during Gaddafi's regime, Libya's economy flourish because of his policies. Maybe some were true, some weren't. I don't care. I cannot swallow the way he died and was treated. Let's not forget that Gaddafi was a unifying factor in Libya. The fact that he did not leave his country during the time of war and turmoil; and that he stood his ground for his beliefs- makes him different from those leaders who, at the sight of war run away like chickens to save their lives. I am not saying that Gaddafi was hero. No one is a hero. But he also deserves as much respect as a leader as he once was. I didn't like the way he fought against his own people. He could have listened more. Yes, he could have stayed but he could have listened more.

I agree with my friend who said that, us, Filipinos could never do that to our leader. Marcos was allowed to flee during the first Edsa revolution. We are too soft and compassionate to do such a thing. Upon learning about Gaddafi, I got scared of Libyans.

No one wants a dictator. But no one also wants an ineffective leader. For 42 years, his leadership was questioned by the international community. And those who believe in "democracy" labelled his way as dictatorial. I am not going to question that. I want to leave it to the Libyan people, because after all they are the ones who truly witness the life under Gaddafi's regime. What I am going to question is what we are all calling democracy, the international community's democratic faith which by now I doubt. As far as I see it, democracy today lies in the hands of the corporations. Democracy? Please...

Maybe this is the idealistic part of me that's saying, if we continue to kill each other, it's getting more impossible for us to be healed and be united collectively. If only we could find a way. I don't know.

Numbers 25 and 26: The Sceptre and Discrimination

2011-10-24T07:40:00.000-07:00

I was asked to post more Karmic Numbers. Here are the meanings of 25 and 26. If you need help with computing your name numbers, leave me message here or on my facebook wall.

Number 25- Discrimination and Analysis

25 bestows spiritual wisdom gained through careful observation of people and things, and worldly success by learning through experience. Its strength comes from overcoming disappointments in the early life and possessing the rare quality of learning from past mistakes. The judgment is excellent, but it's not a material number; therefore, financial benefits of a substantial nature must be gained through other Compound numbers in the full birth and name numerological analysis.

Number 27- The Sceptre

This is an excellent, harmonious, and fortunate number of courage and power, with a touch of enchantment. It blesses the person or entity it represents with a promise of authority and command. It guarantees that great rewards will come from the productive labors, the intellect, and the imagination, that the creative faculties have sown good seeds which are certain to reap a rich harvest. People or entities represented by the compound number 27 should always carry out their original ideas and plans, and not be intimidated or influenced by the diverse opinions or oppositions of others. 27 is a number of karmic reward, earned in more than one previous incarnations.

Source: Star Signs: The Secret Code of the Universe by Linda Goodman.

Inadequacy, Enemy and Growth

2011-10-23T11:11:00.000-07:00

a fear of inadequacy is a sign of a rotten ego.

a failed marriage/s on your back

a dead child in your arms

a time wasted pretending you do not care

a job that convinces the world you are right and perfect

restless nights thinking of your little fame

a few followers to pamper your ego

a husband who doesn't have balls

a wife whose face haven't seen light

a negative spirit that fanaticize a religion

are all the reasons why an enemy pities you

***

growth varies from person to person. those who aren't growing are those who wastes their time in awe by others' growth

More on Karmic Numbers: How to Know Your Name Number

2011-10-23T04:05:00.000-07:00

More research about karma, karmic debts and numerology. This is still based from the book of Linda Goodman, Star Signs: The Secret Code of the Universe. A name number of a person or an entity is just as important as the birth number. The combination of the two influences a person or an entity's karmic path. Here's how to find out one's name number.

Above is a table of the alphabet based from the Chaldean-Hebrew Kabala Numerical Alphabet. Each letter corresponds to a numerical value which will be used to compute the name number. This is the one we will used for reference. First, read the rules and example carefully for computing numbers 11 and 22 as exemptions.

Here's an example:

Now, notice my name below and the corresponding numerical values under each letter. They are added horizontally to get a compound number and a single number.

Example Number 1:

A N A B E L L E A G U I S A N D A G O N Z A L E S

1 5 1 2 5 3 3 5 1 3 6 1 3 1 5 4 1 3 7 5 7 1 3 5 3

25 25 34

7 7 7

Compound Key Number is 21

Single Key Number is 3 (2 +1= 3)

My Birth numbers are 10 (July 10) and 1 (1+0=1)

My Name Numbers are: 21 and 3 (based from above calculations.)

Meanings of Number 10 and 21:

My Birth Number is 10- The Wheel of Fortune

10 is symbolized by Isis and Osiris. A number of rise and fall, according to personal desire. The name will be known for good or evil, depending on the action chosen. 10 is capable of arousing the extreme responses of love or hate- respect or fear. There is no middle ground between honor or dishonor. Every event is self-determined. 10 is the symbol of Love and Light, which create all that can be imagined, and also contains the code: Image 10 Ordain. Image it, and it shall be. Ordain it and it will materialized. The power for manifestng creative concepts into reality is inherent, but must be used with wisdom, since the power for absolute creation contains polarity power for absolute destruction. Self-discipline and infinite compassion must accompany the gift of the former to avoid the tragedy of the latter. Discipline preceeds dominion.

21- The Crown of the Magi

21 is pictured as "the universe" and is also called "the crown of the magi." It promises general success and guarantees advancement, honors, awards and general elevation in the life and career. It indicates victory after a long struggle, for the crown of magi is gained only after long initiation, much soul testing and various tests of determination. However, the person or entity blessed with the number 21 may be certain of final victory over all odds and all opposition. It's a most fortunate vibration- a number of karmic reward.

Example Number 2: (This is interesting.)

P A R I S H I L T O N

8 1 2 1 3 5 1 3 4 7 5

15 25

6 7

Compound Key number is: 13

Single Key Number is 4 ( 1+3=4)

Her Birth number are February 17 (1+7=8)

Her name number is 13 (1+3=4)

Meanings of Number 17 and 13

The Star of the Magi.

This is a highly spiritual number, and was expressed in symbolism by the ancient chaldeans as the 8-poined star of venus. The star of Magi is the image of love and peace, and promises that the person or entity it represents will rise superior in spirit to the trials and difficulties of earlier life, with the ability to conquer former failure in personal relationships and the career. 17 is the number of immortality, and indicates that the person's name will live after him. This is an extremely fortunate compound number, with one warning. It reduces to a single number 8 so its important for anyone with 17 as a compound key number to carefully read the section abot the numbers 4 nd 8.

13- Regeneration and Change

13 is not an unlucky number, as many people believe. The ancients claimed that "he who understands how to use the number 13 will be given power and dominion." The symbol of 13 is a skeleton, or earth, with a scythe, reaping down men in a field of new grown grass, where young faces and heads appear to be thrusting through the ground and emerging on all sides. 13 is a number of upheaval, so that new ground may be broken. It's associated with power, which if used for self fish purpose, will bring destruction upon itself. There is a warning of the unknown and the unexpected. Adapting to change gracefully will bring out the strength of the 13 vibration, and decrease any potential for negative. 13 is associated with genius- also with explorers, breaking the orthodox and new discoveries of all kinds.

More of the meaning of numbers 4 and 8 here. Paris Hilton was born on the 17 which makes her an 8. Her name happens to be a 4. Coincidence? What Linda Goodman said about 4 and 8 numbers could be true as 8 people could attract numbers 4 in their lives.

Examples of entities with its name numbers:

More examples...

Example Number 1: ( The Fountain Yield, former name of my blog)

T H E F O U N T A I N Y I E L D

4 5 5 8 7 6 5 4 1 1 5 1 1 5 3 4

14 37 14

5 10 5

Name Number is 20 ( 5 + 10 + 5=20)

Meaning of Number 20

Here's another example

U N I T E D A R A B E M I R A T E S

6 5 1 4 5 4 1 2 1 2 5 4 1 2 1 4 5 3

25 6 25

7 6 7

Again, the name number is 20 ( Fair enough, My former blog The Fountain Yield was created while I was in UAE.)

Lastly, the author wants to say...

For Libya and the Rest of the World

2011-10-22T00:37:00.000-07:00

anger can only fuel you to some extent. the more you use it, the more you'll get burned until you find yourself nothing but ashes.

only compassion and forgiveness can heal a broken society, a broken family and a broken heart.

Happiness, Investments and Life

2011-10-20T02:59:00.000-07:00

happiness is not seeing yourself being happy. happiness is seeing others happy because you are happy.

the wisest investments you could ever have is the investment in yourself.

the mystery in life is not as much as puzzling as the mystery you have within yourself.

Fear and Courage

2011-10-19T00:52:00.000-07:00

The most heroic thing that you can do in your lifetime is face your fears.

Shedding light to your own darkness, that is strength. Shedding light to others, that is courage

Integrity

2011-10-18T05:18:00.000-07:00

Integrity means having to say to your loved ones, to your enemies and to yourself ... I am who I am, because of you...

Love N Light: Forgiveness and Letting Go...

2011-10-17T04:29:00.000-07:00

Life is all about healing, forgiveness and letting go. It's all about searching what's inside and understand through our higher self who we are and what we are here for. Letting go is not about trying to forget the pains in the past, rather accepting it as part of who we will become. Life is all about balanced and surrendering to our intuition, trusting that the world is what it is supposed to be. Forgiveness is letting go not only through minds and our hearts but most importantly through our spirits.

Inspiration isn't possible if our heart is weary. Being in love is a state of consciousness and its not exclusive to a single beloved. Being in love comes from us, from our balanced state and could only be achieve through a forgiving heart.

I hibernate for awhile, few changes occur. Now I'm back. Got a new blog, new design, new theme, new title, everything is new. I hope you guys like this new appearance. Cheers to all!

How the Light Works...

2011-10-16T04:19:00.000-07:00

Nobody goes to fire, without being consumed....

***

My ex bf: You haven't changed, Ann

Me: What?!

My ex bf: You still haven't changed. You're still the person I used to know.

Me: What do you mean by that?

My ex bf: You still don't care what other people think about you.

Me: Lol, why would I care no? I think that the most pathetic people in the world are those who become restless just coz their little piece of "fame" or position is threatened. They aren't only caged, they are also boxed within their i-am-the-auhority, i-own-the-universe kind of thinking. Lol. It's pathetic. There's no freedom in that. I wonder how these people sleep at night.

My ex bf: Yeah... that's why I thought, you haven't changed.

Me: hahhahaah maybe coz if I care about what other people think of me, I wouldn't post my paintings. hahhahah or maybe not. I have changed I guess, I've become more appreciative to those who love me and care for me and to those who appreciates me. I've become colder and more indifferent to those who are negative towards me.

***

She: You know what Ann, you are blessed. You are lucky.

Me: Why is that?

She: Because you can do whatever you want to do. You are free. You have options in life.

Me: Options?

She: Yes, options. Unlike us who are still trapped in our routine lives. We go to work then go home same old same old, we're stagnant. But you, you have something to do that you are passionate about Not just one but a lot. You have your training that not all of us can even afford to have. I wish I could do the same but I can't. I am so proud of you, here you are, doing what you love to do ever since. You've always been this way since college. Nothing and no one can stop you. We're at the same age but where you are right now, your way ahead than there rest of us. Your going to have your own business soon, and people trusts you.

Me: Well, I don't know. This is just me. You know me, right? I've always lived my life the way I want to not the way others want me too. I value my freedom.

She: Yeah, I think you're great and amazing. That's what I admire about you. You can do anything. Just anything. You do what you want and you don't let others stop you from doing what you want. You're an inspiration to all of us, you know.

Me: It's not about being great. I'm just being me and being happy. That's all.

She: I really admire that in you.

Me: Thank you.

***

Former classmate: I am so proud of you, I really wish my daughter would be like you. You're so talented and real.

Me: Thanks. But please don't wish it for your daughter. I wouldn't wish anyone to be like me considering what I've gone through. Let her be herself, support her dreams and help her develop her talents. Let her be who she is and be with her all the time. That's all you could and should do for your daughter.

Former classmate: I will do exactly what you said. Thank you for the advice. I also want my daughter to learn how to paint like you. You're self taught right?

Me: Yes, I am self taught.

Former classmate: How did you learn to do it?

Me: Honestly? I closed my eyes and breathe. heheheh Seriously, I don't think art is something you could learn from outside. I mean, your daughter has to discover it for herself just like what happened to me. She can go to school to know some techniques and the right materials to use but she has to be free to be able to create her own art, you know. This is hard to explain. I wish I knew.

I just picked up a brush and play with the colors and do what I want to do. It's just intuition. There's nothing spectacular about my art. I just paint, that's all.

***

Wait a sec... I was criticized for quoting some guru nanak before. I almost forgot about it. My eyebrows raised, as usual. What's wrong with quoting someone? Er, I create my own quotes too. It's nice to be quoted, no. It means people understands you. So why am I being criticized for quoting someone I look up to, someone who inspires me? So I was thinking, maybe these people wanted to be quoted instead. Oh, ears clapping of course. Why not, they want a piece of fame. I totally understand, human nature why not, ayt? So I thought. Very hard. I consider them as "somebody". Benefit of the doubt, remember? But then again, as I reflect, there's nothing about them that inspires me, there's nothing about what they write sounds inspiring to me.

Sorry but I cannot give respect to those people who compare themselves with their own kind and then try to convince others that they are better than them. It sounds "garbageee" to me. This is nothing but a trashy kind of thinking, far from being sophisticated. I mean if you really know who you are and what you are capable of, you don't have to compare yourself with others because the former gives power in itself.

Its really very simple, you don't need a PHD to understand what is going on behind these negative people. If you are someone who has integrity, you wouldn't have to convince people you have one because integrity in itself requires practicing what you preach. So it goes without saying that whatever it is you are bragging to all of us, isn't really true.

The thing is, you can always fool the world, baby... but never yourself. I am just a reflector, you know. I just illuminates the dark. That's how the light works...

Speaking of quote, I've read one laughable statement ever, says "If you are going to write for your enemies, you should write better." Lol. hahahah LMAO. What's that again? She wants what? She wants some sort of diplomatic correspondence or some treaty-ish, constitutional form with articles subdivided into sections. Hahahha Yet, she can't even respond to what is being presented to her, when her shits went out and highlighted to her face. She keeps going round in circles, find more reasons to debate about. Who's stupid person would write for his/her enemies? Maybe, you write about your enemy, not for them. Dear enemy... hahahha LMAO.

This is how the light works...

Balancing of Chakras

2011-10-15T01:54:00.000-07:00

Who says art and sex are not related to each other. And that you can create something without tapping into your sexual energy? The second energy level located just below our navel is called Svadhisthana means dwelling place of the self. It is related to the color orange and sense of taste. This is the energy source for our sexual balance, creative energies and ability to have a harmonious relationships.

&lt;p&gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;br&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;W&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&lt;/p&gt;

This shows how important it is to have a balanced sexual energy and how sex should be treated as something that is sacred to all of us. Our regenerative ability and healing power depends on its balanced state. This is something we all should value within ourselves.

Yoga: The Eagle and More...

2011-10-14T09:49:00.000-07:00

I just changed my yoga routine into the basics lately. This pose is called the eagle (garudasana) is my favorite. I've been into it along with other poses for months and months now. I keep changing my routine, mixing them up so I won't get bored. It helps because I discover new level of awareness physically and mentally.

Everyday, non-stop yoga routine, meditation at night. I feel like I am an addict fallen into this healthy addiction. Here is the step-by step on how it is done. Though I won't advice anyone to do this without doing some stretching and warming up at the beginning, check it out, you might love it too.

***

Seriously, I am thankful to those who are expressing their love and appreciation for my paintings. I've been getting a lot of wonderful feedbacks from pips around the world. Positive energy is always the best and welcome! I know there are others too who comes here but maybe don't have time to express it and I am thankful too. I am grateful to those who give time to express their love for my work. One says that my art is very unique and that she could understand my art better now that I've let "my chickens out." =) heheheheh I am thankful. I guess thats the purpose of art being self-expression, letting your chickens out. Art is all about letting all the craps and shits out, doing it in a sophisticated and specific way that only the artist could understand.

***

I am not sure how long will I be able to keep this blog as my business plans is about to get ahead soo. I will miss blogging definitely. Though, I won't stop painting till all the paints in this world run out. Even if I end up a beggar on the street that I won't be able to buy anything, I'll steal a child's pencil and crayon just to draw and paint. Sorry but this is an addiction. I am saying to sorry to my haters by the way who says my work is crap and who thinks I will stop doing what I love to do, just coz...

***

Speaking of haters, I was asked in my favorite forum (astrofix) how do I handle haters. Hahahha I was laughing when I replied to it. I said, I annihilate them to the core. Well, what else can you do? There are people who were born to do that. There are people who are hired to scratch a diamond to let it sparkle even more, right? Then I added, "the more they try to put me on the ground, the more I get my coals so I could turn them into my diamonds, my diamonds, my treasure. Not theirs."

Jeeeezzz... I will definitely miss blogging, once I step out onto my business. I will miss my haters, people who thinks they have a better idea on how I should live my life. I will miss the power they are giving me. I will be hated by my co-workers soon. =)

***

I remember Steve Jobs, he says "I was rejected, but I am still inlove." I'll never forget this quote I heard from his 2005? speech. Man, I know what it feels like to be rejected. It hurts! It's painful... something inside me died. But well, BUT... I am still in love. What can I do? I feel so much in love.. =)

The Numbers of Fate and Destiny: 4 and 8

2011-10-12T21:26:00.000-07:00

More on my research about karma and negative karmas. I find the numbers 4 and 8 interesting because the author has emphasized more of it on her book (Star Signs: The Secret Code of the Universe). Basically these two numbers hold a negative karma. She warned those people whose compound numbers 17, 22, 26, and 31st, by which results to 4 and 8 when added. She says,

"These are known (especially when combined) as the "Numbers of Fate" and the "Numbers of Karma" and hard luck seems to pursue those whose lives are dominated by the 4 and 8."

She explains "When the 4 and 8 is the Single number of the day of birth, such as the 4th, 8th, 13th, 17th, 22nd, 26th or 31st, the number chosen by the person it represents in the wiser state of grace between incarnations. The higher self (soul or spirit), realizing that there are heavy karmic debts to be balanced, which have been delayed or procrastinated for too many lifetimes, chooses the magnetic birth channel of the 4 or the 8 to insure that these long overdue kamic obligations are faced and finally neutralized. One the level of awareness between incarnations, the full import of the karmic chain is comprehended."

Here's my question. So if a person born on the dates 13th, 17th, 22nd, 26th or 31st, is there a hope for them as to how they could lessen their bad lucks?

Linda Goodman's says: "Naturally, one can't avoid the 4 and 8 vibration as a birth number, nor one should be able to, since the 4 or the 8 guarantees that the person influenced by it will be placed involuntarily in specific situations where particular karma will be balanced in the present existence..."

" When 4 or 8 is the birth number, care should be taken to AVOID the numbers 4 and 8 in all other ways, such as address an phone numbers which add to a compound number than can be reduced to the single 4 and 8-- and to avoid taking important action or planning significant events on dates equalling either of these two numbers, such as the 4th, 8th, 13th, 17th, 22nd, 26th or 31st. Most people can handle the 4 and 8 vibration alone. It's the combination of them-- the doubling up and increasing the power of the 4 and the 8 that becomes powerfully fatalistic, and causes these unfortunate people to attract far more than their share of bad luck, losses, heartbreak, and disappointments."

4 and 8 has a degree of difference between them, says the author. 8 people have more fatalistic vibration than the 4. 8 people's road to success can be a hard one, strewn with obstacles. They could rise to a person with authority but it burdens them with stressful responsibilities, great anxiety and long hours. In addition, 8 people are often required to pay too high price of love, which almost invariably bring with it suffering of some kind.

Here's the more interesting part. Since under the law of magnetic attraction, 4 and 8 people seem to be irresitably drawn together in all kinds of relationships: love, marriage, friendships and business associations- relatives and relatives by marriage--> A man born on the 8th, 17th or 26th day of the month marries a woman born on the 4th, 13th, 22nd, or 31st day of the month (or whose name equals the single number 4). By thus combining the 4 and the 8, the power of these numbers is increased, and the 8 man will experience many blows of fate, mental tension, and emotional sadness in the married state.

So I wonder, are all those 8 people always end up with 4 people? Or could they choose not to be with the person or marry a 4 person? The author says they can. But "they may not, however, be able to avoid all relationships with other 4 or 8 people, because most of these karmic obligations which must be dealt with and balanced. Most of the 8 person's close friends, business associates, and relatives will usually b a 4 or an 8 by birth or have names which equal one of these two numbers. "

For example, a person born on the 17th. The number 17 is described in the book as, The Star of the Magi.

"This is a highly spiritual number, and was expressed in symbolism by the ancient chaldeans as the 8-poined star of venus. The star of Magi is the image of love and peace, and promises that the person or entity it represents will rise superior in spirit to the trials and difficulties of earlier life, with the ability to conquer former failure in personal relationships and the career. 17 is the number of immortality, and indicates that the person's name will live after him. This is an extremely fortunate compound number, with one warning. It reduces to a single number 8 so its important for anyone with 17 as a compound key number to carefully read the section abot the numbers 4 nd 8."

The warning to the 17 people cannot be more emphasized as they have the 8 vibration. It's compound number 17 promises huge success in this lifetime "however, those 8 people who choose to increase the power of the 8 in their lives rather than avoid it must take care to avoid the number 4 whenever possible-- because it's the combination of these two numbers that brings strong magnetic negative influences to bear upon them. "

"This is why the 4 should not, under any circumstances, increase the power of the number 4, since a double 4 equals 8. They should avoid, once again, the combination of these two numbers. And because an extra 4 here and there, along with the birth number of 4 (born on the 4th, 13th, 22nd or 31st) will bring, by addition, the 8 influence to bear, creating the ver combination the ancients warn to avoid."

More compound numbers with numbers 4 and 8 vibration:

13- Regeneration and Change (my youngest brother has this)

13 is not an unlucky numbe, as many people believe. The ancients claimed that "he who understands how to use the number 13 will be given power and dominion." The symbol of 13 is a skeleton, or eath, with a scythe, reaping down men in a field o new grown grass, where young faces and heads appear o be thrusting through the ground and emerging on all sides. 13 is a number of upheaval, so that new ground may be broken. It's associated with powe, which if used for selffis purpose, will bring destruction upon itself. There is a warning of the unknown and the unexpected. Adapting to change gracefully will bring out the strength of the 13 vibration, and decrease any potential for negative. 13 is associated with genius- also with explorers, breaking the orthodox and new discoveries of all kinds.

22- Submission - and Caution

22 is symbolized by the ancients as a "good man, blinded by the folly of others, with a knapsack on his back, full of errors." In the image he seems to offer no defense against ferocious tiger which i abou to attack him. It's a warning number of illusion and delusion. It indicates a good person or entity who lives in a fool's paradise; a dreamer who awakens only when surrounded by danger, when it's often too late. It warns of mistakes in judgment, of placing faith in those who are not trustworthy. If 22 is the birth number, the person it represents should exercise caution and watchfulness (since the birth number cannot be altered) in both career and personal matters. The karmic obligation here is to be more alert, to curb "spiritual laziness" and develop more spiritual aggressiveness- to realized your own power to change things, to prevent failure by simply ordaining success. When this responsibility is recognized, practiced and finally mastered, the 22 person can be in control of events, no longer blinded by the folly of other and will see ideas achieved and dreams realized.

26 Partnerships

This compound number vibrates , in a strange way, to a unique kind power, based on compassion and unselffishness, with the ability to help other, but not always the self. 26 is full of contradictions. It warns of the dangers, dissappointments, and failure, especially regarding the ambitions, brought about through bad advice, association with others, and unhappy partnerships of all kinds. If 26 is the compound key number of the name, it might be best to change the name to achieve a more fortunate influence. If 26 is the birth number therefore cannot be altered, the person is counseled to avoid partnerships and pursue the career alone, not heeding even the well-intentioned and advice of others, but follow only theersonal hunchs and intuition-- although this should be well examined for flaws before acting on them. 26 people should begin at once to stablized the income, to save money, and not behave in an extravagant manne or invest in other people's ideas. Invest in your own future, b generous with others, especially those who are in need, but also build a solid foundation for the future for yourself.

31- The Recluse
Those whose birth and name number is 31 should first read the analysis of the foregoing Compound number 30, because 31 is very similar to it, except that the person (or entity) represented by the number is even more self-contained, self-sufficient, lonely and isolated from others. Quite often, genius is present, or at least high intelligence. At some unexpected time in the life, the glittering promise of the world will be suddenly rejected for the peace and quiet of Nature, or if the response to the 31 is not quite that pronounced, there will nvertheless eventually be a degree o retreat of society in some manner. The 31 person is sometimes opinionated, an advocate of political change, while remaining fixed in personal habits. Even in a crowd, a 31 person will often feel a sense of loneliness and isolation.

This is rather informative and somehow some truth with regard to some people I personally know. They need help more to shed light to their true nature and perhaps, change their lives for the better.

Love and Light

2011-10-12T09:23:00.000-07:00

I've been doing a lot of research about some esoteric knowledges for sometime now. I can't remember when I started having an interest with planets and astrology. I am curious as usual. I admire astrologers and those people who can interpret the planets and use their knowledge to help people. It's a gift. Sadly, I think I don't have this, though I am still curious. =)

Dad bought me Linda Goodman's Star Signs book. Boy, it's a like a bible to me. This book is stuffed with knowledges about astrology, numerology, karma, lexigrams, ancient codes and even gemology. It's pretty useful if you are someone who likes to get to the bottom of things and find answers.

So recently, I've been doing a lot of contemplating about my life, my karma etc etc because lately I've been encountering people who seem to be needing help. Not that I don't want to help them but I just don't know how. I've always been someone who goes to the store, then all of a sudden a person comes to me, download his or her problems for some unknown gaddamn reason. I've always been a listener and as I see it now, this is a gift and a curse as well. Because not until I find a way to protect myself from their negative energies, I will always suffer and left exhausted hearing their problems. Much worse, when I develop a feelings to someone who happens to come to me for help. As if my life couldn't get any worse. Hay... =(

Anyway, so this numerology and karmic path makes me really curious. According to Chaldean, or according to Linda, numbers can illuminate a truth about our karmic path. For example, birthdates and the name number. Name number meaning the number that comes out from computing a person's name based from the table alphabet she gave. Then the corresponding definitions were given as well. No plans of putting all of them here as it covers one whole chapter. Lol.

So here's mine:

My Birth Number is 10- The Wheel of Fortune

And my name number goes:

21- The Crown of the Magi

21 is pictured as "the universe" and is also called "the crown of the magi." it promises general succes and guarantees advancement, honors, awards and general elevation in the life and career. It indicates victory after a long struggle, for the crown of magi is gained only after long initiation, much soul testing and various tests of determination. However, the person or entity blessed with the number 21 may be certain of final victory over all odds and all opposition. It's a most fortunate vibration- a number of karmic reward.

Its not that I believe in this 100 percent. I will always remain skeptical of course but I have to say that the said above resonate with me and my life so far. It gave me comfort knowing that after all those struggles I deal with in the past, it will be over soon. At least there's a rainbow at the end of it all. I felt sad as well because I can't help but to look back at my life, remember all those times when everything seems like hell. I want to forget it, but its part of me and will always be.

This is based from the belief that we are all souls living on this earth with a purpose. Some are paying for their karmic debts, some are enjoying their karmic rewards. I feel compassionate for those who have a negative karma with them. There are birthdates that are just horrible. So as they say, their fate is inescapable.The author gave solutions as to balance the negative karma of the person but it doesn't change circumstances and the events in their lives. A friend of mine asked me, so what can we do with them? I said, I don't know, I guess we can't do anything for them but to listen and feel compassionate.

Lastnight, I shared this info with a friend of mine who is going through a painful separation with her relationship. She said that hers is true. And it's comforting because it sheds light to who we are as a human being. She finds it comforting to know that what she's going through is her karmic path. Somehow she feels liberated from guilt and from her past.

I got stuck with this online thing going on, not that I regret helping someone. I wanted to help him by my own little way, shed light to what he is going through and hopefully saved his life from total destruction. I think I did my job because I was able to somehow help him. I never throw judgement on to anyone but I still get judged somehow, thought I have a bad intention or somethng. It makes me sad. I cannot give more than I've already given. At least, not that I know of. I feel really really bad if a relationship goes sour. May it be a friendship, a romantic one, a familial or professional. It makes me feel bad.

So this is comforting somehow because I always look back, doubt myself if what I did is right. These esoteric knowledges shed light to the truth that it is not I who has the negative karma. It backs up the inner voice inside me that says, hey you know what, I am just trying to help. I just happen to have the light and the love within me, so I attract these people who needs my comfort. I am not selffish and I have no plans of using my abilities and talents to spread destruction and fear. I could not make myself suffer for the sake of other people. I have to protect myself and to take care of myself as well.

For now, I'll continue my research, gain more knowledge, cultivate more patience on my part, discover more talents and gifts that is yet to be discovered within me. Hopefully, I'll still have the strength to wait for my Crown of Magi.

To those who are also curious like me and want to know your karmic paths, leave your message at the comments section, and I'll get back to you.

Death and Healing

2011-10-09T00:02:00.000-07:00

I've been reading Anya Sophia Mann's website at anyasophiamann.com. Her site is simply amazing. I can't help but to share some of the spiritual quotes from her sites that speaks to me personally.

“Death is a stripping away of all that is not you. The secret of life is to "die before you die" ---

and find that there is no death. " - Eckhart Tolle

"Healing is the balancing of a system – whether it be a human body, a family, a corporation, or a country. ~ Anya Sophia Mann

I can so relate to this. As I look back, I've changed a lot. My personality, my physical body, my perspective, my goals, my inner life, even my previous concerns and fears. It doesn't matter anymore... Everything in my life has changed. And I have to say that its all because of the "death" I went through in the past and I keep dying everyday. I am beginning to understand how "death" is necessary in life as it is needed in transition. Since life is all about transition and change, death is part of the process of renewing life itself.

I am beginning to understand that only through embracing and accepting this beautiful mysterious process of life through our intuition, that we may fully understand our existence, our interconnectedness with each other.

I am continuing my yoga routine, and I could tell I am getting better with it. I feel more engaged with my poses now than before. But I have to say that there are times when I feel I have to dragged myself to practice it. It takes a lot of will power and dispcline to wake up early morning, sit back, and center my mind so I could begin my routine. There are times when I ask myself why am I doing this? And I realized somehow that the will that keeps me going doesn't come from pursuing a goal of sheer vanity, rather on simply wanting to enjoy my journey within... I've learned so much from doing yoga all these years. I am still learning and will never stop learning. Healing through balance speaks so loudly to me as it happens to me everyday. I seek for balance not only around me but also and most importantly, within myself.

I love my life so much. There may be times when I feel so down and trapped in the dark but still I am grateful that I could feel, that I am connected in this world. I may have feel all the pains in the world, hear every cries and sufferings or feel every joy and sorrow everyday as I relate to people; or as I open my conciousness to the world around me. But this is what makes me human. This is my humanity. This is who I am and will always be. I am not going to numb myself so I won't feel the pain. I am not going to escape myself either and pretend I don't care. I face my pain, I face my sorrow, and I face my death. And I will continue to seek balance and healing to myself not only because I feel this is the right thing to do, but also because I know deep inside me that I heal others too.

If Only...

2011-10-07T09:14:00.000-07:00

If only I could embrace every child in the world who are suffering right now, i'll tell them how much they are loved and that everything will be alright; I would...

It's sad to lose one great man, may you rest in peace Steve Jobs. A man who lived his life fulfilled shall have a victorious death.

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma- which is living with other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other people's opinion drown out your own inner voice. And most important have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary." - Steve Jobs.

Nice words, sir. It is indeed courage that is needed to follow one's heart. In the face of opposition, it's only our hearts that could protect us and shed the light for truth. Only the strong lives freely.